The government bailout of Twinkies

Munchies in Q Huts

One of my colleagues approached me with a business deal today. “Could we buy out all the Twinkies stock around the world and sell them next to marijuana dispensaries in Colorado? ‘” After all they think we will shut them down and this entrepreneurial opportunity would show that we care about the pot heads as much as everything. The pluses for our endeavor is that by buying thousands of Twinkies and selling them for $10 on the dollar is that our profit margin would be great.


Quonset Huts for Munchies

The second is the message opportunity that might have wonderful evangelical results- With every package of Twinkies comes a  Biblical message and beside that the long shelf life of the artificial ingredients are forever! I love brainstorms and the small business spirit with big ideas. But wait there’s more: “if the government doesn’t bail out Hostess, the opportunity for them to emerge from bankruptcy stronger and better managed is classic free enterprise system. So my Christian, right-winged, partners will target existing dispensaries and have a theme: Quonset  Huts! This is so survivalist! And with the mess we are in this idea could actually save our economy! I have already registered the name and the DBA as “Munchies Hut a no gas survival station.”

Michelle’s Right to Bare Arms

The dream seemed so real until I caught a glimpse of a woman who thought she had a right to bear arms. She said her name was Michelle and she was on a crusade to stop little pudgy American children. She was wearing a sleeveless shirt because as she said “I have great arms and a right to bear them.” my dream turned nightmare continued, the mayor of New York has banned me and Big Gulp and hands me an ordinance with a restraining order. But there is a silver lining, my first contract from a Americanized Chinese Food Chain is replacing fortune cookies with Bible Verse Twinkies. my partner said “Whoa Dude this is like so wrong!” Grateful Dead music pulsated through my head which is weird since I don’t even like Grateful Dead Music. Like Twinkies it is an acquired taste and since social engineering has nothing to do with getting the economy back on track we should all keep “truckin” until Jesus comes back again. To prove there are no ad ideas in a bong-faced brainstorm my partner’s had an idea for expansion- “Susy Q’s” he blurted out and snorted.




One thought on “The government bailout of Twinkies

  1. Pingback: The government bailout of Twinkies « East Coast Cafe-Triology

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